Not a Fairytale PART 4

In 2014 the Australian Bureau of Statistics reported that 1 in 4 Australian women had experienced some form of emotional abuse at the hands of their partner. That fraction equates to over 2 million Australian women. 1.2 million men also reported to have experienced emotional abuse from their partners. 

The ABS defines emotional abuse as "abuse that occurs when a person is subjected to behaviours or actions (often repeatedly) aimed at preventing or controlling their behaviour, with the intent to cause them emotional harm or fear through manipulation, isolation or intimidation" (ABS, 2014).

PART 4 - Branching Out

Barry had some exciting news. He had met another lovely woman on Tinder called Alexandra. This news was only for his family and Nate, of course. No one else would appreciate the secret like they did. Clearly Georgina and Samara wouldn't understand. 

Alexandra, like Samara, was struck by how intense Barry was in his pursuit of her. Although he seemed so affectionate and perfectly suited that she brushed aside the niggling doubt that things might be moving too quickly. A few odd incidents popped up. Such as Barry's Netflix playlist, showing he'd watched Cinderella and She's The Man 'by himself'. Georgina, in fact had watched those movies while she was staying with him, because they were spending much of Georgina's spare time together as a couple, despite initially agreeing to separate for a while. Funnily enough, Barry was also spending much of Samara's spare time with her as a couple. Alexandra and Barry also spent their free time together. Sometimes Barry and his 'partner for the evening' would spend time with Nate and his girlfriend. Sometimes they would go to Barry's mother's farm for the weekend. Barry had them all on a tight schedule.

Interestingly, it seems important to note here that Barry was drawn to a particular type of woman; compassionate, caring, selfless, highly intelligent, charismatic and successful. It was a clear case of opposites attract. Everything that Barry wanted to be, he sought in his partners, yet he spent an extraordinary amount of energy disparaging these exact characteristics. All three women were educators, a vocation of which Barry the Charming was known to have once pompously said "those who can't do, teach". His scathing view of teachers was seemingly more of a reflection of his own feelings of inadequacy and how it threatened his entrenched elitist worldviews.

In September, Georgina travelled through Europe for a few weeks. Barry went 'alone' to Thailand with Samara. He told both Alexandra and Georgina that he was travelling alone. He spent their entire holiday, however, sending both Alexandra and Georgina messages about how lonely he was and how he desperately missed them. Similar to what he told Samara on his non-honeymoon with Georgina. Samara had no idea, and believed their holiday to be a romantic getaway, just the two of them.

Have I lost you yet? It gets even more bizarre. 

Georgina arrived back in Australia first. She had seen some activity appear on Barry's Facebook page from Samara and Alexandra in the way of photos, likes and comments. She was convinced by these, that Barry was in Thailand with Samara and offered to pick Barry up from the airport. Barry of course was emphatic that he was being picked up by his brother. Georgina replied that she'd happily call his brother and rearrange it all.

Secretly, she was convinced she would catch Barry coming through the airport gates with Samara. Barry very quickly agreed that yes, Georgina could pick him up. But wait - his plane DIDN'T come in at 7am, as he first thought. He'd made a mistake. Silly him. His plane actually came in at 7pm.

So Georgina went to the airport at 7pm to discover the truth. Unfortunately for Georgina, as glorious as that showdown would have been between her and Barry, it wasn't to be. You see, Barry and Samara's plane DID come in at 7am. Barry dropped Samara home, cancelled his dinner plans with Alexandra because he was too 'tired' from the flight, and instead returned to the airport at 7pm to be 'picked up' by Georgina. Georgina decided that she was indeed crazy, and of COURSE he wouldn't have gone to Thailand with Samara.

If anything, this illustrates the absurd lengths that Barry went to to keep Georgina (I use the term keep, because by this point, he had a collection, rather than relationships). Throughout this entire ordeal, Barry had had years and years of opportunities to break up and move on as a regular person would. Yet he continued to toy with Georgina (and Samara), giving her false hope in a future he had no intention of honouring. And so Georgina convinced herself that she was imagining things, like Barry said, and didn't question it further. Yet her suspicions remained.

Georgina soon spotted a picture on Alexandra's Instagram, taken while she was at Barry's mother's farm in September. Alexandra, had no idea that other women were involved, and thought that she was simply enjoying a weekend away with her long term partner's family. When Georgina quizzed Barry about this she was told that she was crazy, and that Georgina was The Only One he had ever loved/slept with/ thought about. She agreed that of course, she must be completely crazy; as IF he would have gone to Thailand with Samara. As IF he took Alexandra to his mother's farm. She was just paranoid (remember 'gaslighting'?).

At this point, Samara was also incredibly unhappy. She and Barry had been together for two years, and had gone through some particularly traumatic experiences since being with him, yet she couldn't understand why Georgina was still hanging around. It just didn't make sense. Georgina had been out of the picture for two years. It was unfair and inappropriate that she still had so much sway over her relationship with Barry.

Meanwhile, Barry was simultaneously discussing marriage and love and prospective children with all three of his partners. All three were paying his bills, fees, fines and buying him things. They were all cleaning his house and doing his washing. They were all sleeping in the same bed sheets, using the same towels, and going to the same coffee shop in the mornings. They all had the same future goals, watched the same shows, planned to buy the same patch of land in Orange, drank the same alcoholic drinks and planned the same names for their future babies.

If anything, what Barry lacks in imagination, he makes up for in practicality.

Even more odd Facebook incidents were occurring. Georgina found herself one day un-friended by Barry. When she quizzed him about this, he immediately re-friended her, stating that his Facebook account had a 'glitch' in it. When she saw that Barry had also re-friended Samara, she explained that she wasn't comfortable with that and he obliged and un-friended Samara. And so it went, around and around in circles; un-friending, re-friending, un-friending, re-friending. Samara was beginning to think that this Facebook glitch on Barry's account was very poor service on Facebook's behalf. And so she contacted Facebook to make a complaint. Facebook replied awkwardly to inform her that she was being deliberately blocked and unblocked by Barry. When she queried this, he became enraged that she had 'gone behind his back' about the issue. It was simply a Facebook 'glitch', he stated.

Things were getting hectic for Barry now, but that was because he was so clever and important.

Part 5